why.




Reasons are unclear,
Motives are unclear.
Why do I feel this way?
I'm unsure.

Emotional seem to be my forte,
But there bound to be reason for it.
What are the reasons?
Why do they even exist?

It doesn't seem to be easy for me.
I just want to be happy?
Why doesn't my environment permits?
Oh why, I need to know.

Disturbed sleep every night,
I need to shift to somewhere with peace.
There isn't a place for me.
Why, is it so difficult?

Drifting into thoughts,
Thoughts that seem to be a real mood killer.
I'm really tired yet it's uncontrollable.
Why, is this sign of being depress?

Where's my happy pills?
I need them badly.


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Dampen.




How does it feels to have all pouring at you?
No one you can reach out to,
Nobody there to hold you.
Dampen by the emotional rain.

Be it whether am I walking under the scorching sun,
Be it whether am I walking in the pouring rain,
Feeling of lost, feeling of having mixed emotions,
Remains there without any movement.

I beg for help,
I scream with those nightmares,
Nobody seem to hear me,
In a vacuum world, soundless.

I wonder,
How is it like to bid the world goodbye?
How is it like to leave and ending everything?
In deep thoughts.

Sleepless night,
Fake smile and laughters,
Soulless living,
An empty shell.

Feeling really terrible, help.
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Rainy.


Listening to the pouring rain,
Looking at each droplet falling in front of the eyes,
Can't help it, but rains in me as well.
I'm too emotional.

I can feel my eyes getting teary,
I can feel my heart sinking in deeper.
Thoughts came flooding back to me,
I know I shouldn't have.

I wish there will be a machine bringing me back into the past,
To the place where I still have you beside me.
To the place where you teach me how,
To the place you make me fall in deeper.

I know I shouldn't, time to let go.
This rain, just makes me think of you more.
I know I should stop everything about you,
But I came to realisation that I still feels.

Lying on my bed,
listening to the rain falls.
Thoughts of the fact that you left,
Making it rains on me.

I've got the urge,
The urge to run through the rain,
To the place that you are now.
To hold you and tell you how much I miss you.

But what's the use?
You're gone.
Not by my side anymore.
Not there to hear my nonsense.

You seem to have gone for good.
You're happy now.
What am I to do anything?
Where can I stand to reach out to you?

G, I miss you.
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Rust.

Leave things there,
Rust will form.
It's like an open wound,
Waiting to get infected.

Nobody to heal,
Nobody to take care,
Just leave it there,
It will just get worst.

Rust, just let it be.
Drift, without a word.
Pain, just a part of the process.
Numb, it will be.

Tell me, a word of direction.
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Hopes.

No more hopes are given.
Too much disappointments were received.
Not born to accommodate.
Beyond limits to handle.

Space is needed,
Nobody ever return the same treatment.
More than enough,
A must to let loose.

Suffocation is done,
Death of heart shall be.
Nobody to fix,
Blames are point this way instead.

No more words, silence fall.
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Casual.

Casual stuff makes me happy,
Putting a silly smile onto me.
I don't expect much, I guess.
Small things like that, lighten my mood.

Though, it will never last.
But least, it happened for that moment.
Though, those words make no sense.
But least, it gave me silly entertainment.

I realised, I learnt.
Happenings like these, is all I need.
Thanks for it, I appreciate it.
My mood have lighten.

I'm a small kid at times. :)

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Words.

Those words keep replaying in my head.
Actions done causing a lost in me.
I feel shameless, I feel cheap.
I'm another victim, that's what they said.

Though I denied the truth,
But I do feel that I'm pathetic.
I've got no one to turn to.
I admit, I've got a thing for him then.

Such a great lier,
Deceiving the whole world.
You're not everything,
Words have spread, you deserved it.

What are you lacking of?
Nothing but honesty.
You're almost perfect,
But you current actions, disgrace everything.

Such a pity,
Why are you doing this?
What a womaniser,
You ought to be gone.

Your appearance made my heart skipped a beat,
Yet you actions made it shattered.
I don't understand you,
Why are you doing yourself in this manner?

What a shame, I must say.
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Words.

Don't put those words into lies.
It felt so right when you said it.
Remember those words,
Don't change it in your pace.

You made the words to promises.
It's these promises that I believed in.
Don't forget these promises,
They mean much to me.

I'm not a fool,
Don't make me into one.
I do not put a show for your entertainment
It breaks me up.

I'm not as strong as you think I am.
In fact, I'm weak and breaking down.
I needed all those to keep me in place.
So much of it, just lies.

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Hong Kong, Macau, Zhu Hai

sorry that i've not been updating.

yes, there's people nagging at me for not updating.

well, schoolwork, emotion entanglement, friends and work have been eating up all my time.

till now, i'm have a little more time.

well, been to Macau and Hong Kong for a short holiday with seb and tonny.

it was fun, and it's like whole new experience.

i have always wanted to go there anyway.

so yes, guess this the present i gave to myself this year.

words will be minimum, photos up.

you can view more photos in my facebook.

there's no privacy setting, not to worry.

i'm dozing off, bad day today.

Macau, Venetian Hotel

PS : where can you see such classy lights in toilet? CASINO.

seriously, i was so excited when i see this. but when i finally connected to it, it's time to board the ferry to Hong Kong. fuck and die.

i guess Singapore should serve Wanton Mee with beef slice. This one is totally awesome. Beef slice is really tender and the soup doesn't taste like MSG filled. Noodle do have it's texture. Miss it.

beat it, it's an Ice Cream Van. NO, the ice cream is not nice at all. too milky, quite gross after awhile.

I LOVE THIS STALL! EVERY NIGHT IN HONG KONG SUPPER!

THIS, SPICY FISHBALL, IS AN EXTREMELY MUST TRY! i can't seem to have enough of it luh.

total disappointment, waste of my money. i could have shop more. =/

Beverly Plaza Hotel.

Singapore's KFC, please have this real soon.

i do miss Hong Kong for their delicacies.

and i've yet to explore the whole Hong Kong and Macau.

perhaps, i'll go back there soon to continue the unfinished trip.

yes, pay my debts and save up!