just then, feeling ever so lousy.

dearest o9o6o9,

today i feel really lousy.

i'm upset and it makes me feel really terrible of myself.

yes, maybe i'm not a good friend.

i'm really trying so hard and yet, i failed so terribly.

i'm not a good friend, i never know how.

people treat me just like a pillar.

ignoring the presence when not needed.

but yet lean on it when feeling tired.

i don't mind this fact, cause i know i'm in some help.

but it does hurt me sometimes when ignoring get overloaded.

it makes me feel that, my presences is just so insignificant.

my opinion, my views, everything about me, is just override.

i'm not important, it's okay.

i don't matter, it's okay.

i don't have a stand, never mind.

give me a breather, some respect.

maybe that's all i need.

when you all just decide, and making it final without even asking me.

that's what made me upset.

i made my views, all so not important.

other people views, hell yes and agreement.

how do you feel if you're in my shoes?

great? happy? joyful?

i doubt so.

sometimes i feel like a fool for being a friend.

in friends, you don't need consideration.

you don't have to consider whether to continue the friendship or what.

it seems so sick and make me feel really retarded.

once a friend, is always a friend, this is my statement.

even if now you hate me, dislike me, drifted away,

but one day if you need help, i'm oh-so-willing to help you out.

this is me.

i'm going really easy on everything.

i don't wanna voice some stuff out,

cause i don't want everything to turn so ugly or anything.

i just want it to drift away.

leave me out, i keep my silence.

making joke out of me, i'll laugh with you.

shout at me, i'm all ears to it.

ignoring me, i'll just forget it.

i'm easily affected,

that's all.

Signing off,

Jacqualine

it's seem so long, yet short in actual.



met up with darling in town just now.
like finally? seriously.

the last time i met her was new year's eve/new year.
not lunar new year.
of course, i miss that girl.

went for pedicure session.
it's great cause finally all my dead skin is gone.
and i finally had french pedicure.

don't mind my PIG toes. :(

i had french manicure lots of time.
but not for pedicure.
guess i still prefer to french manicure.
:S

how long have it been since i've done shopping online?
months and months!
i'm a poor girl.

maybe count it as a moment of impulse.
but i've spent almost a hundred in moments.
and now i'm only left with 3 bucks in my bank!
will any kind souls "accidentally" transfer some money to me?
HEHE!

anyway, i'm satisfied with my buys!
all of them i'll use it for sure.
and it's pretty!

M·A·C 'Hello Kitty®' Brush Collection

Geo Lens : Angel Colour in green.

Geo Lens : Honey Wing.

argh, i need money badly!
there's so many things i wanna do.
but yet i can't.

reasons?
LACKING OF FUNDS!
give me some events job please!
lobangs?

:(

G'nights

i feel tired with certain people around.
they are like draining me down fast.

i need some people around to get me full bar.
but these people, they don't seem to be free for me at all.
it's like, am i pathetic or lousy?

sometimes i rather to be myself.
at least, i can seek for self-console.
it's much better this way for me.

peijun, GRACIE, shuxian, edmund, G and some other few,
where the hell are you all.
somehow, i need you all now...