chapter 317.

walk in the rain,

wash off those masks, wash off the pain, wash off all the thoughts. drench the feelings, drench the unhappiness, drench the burning sensation left in everything.

leave me lying there, all drench and dead.

let's not stop the pouring rain.

realization.



well, if you don't like my actions, it's none of my problem.
you can speak up to me, but i've got my reasons for my act.
don't think you're oh-so-innocent, cause there's fault with you too.
i'm sick of you thinking that everything is everybody's fault and not yours.
you're not always right, nobody is.

you should do some self-reflection.
i know i maybe overboard, but i really can't stand you attitude.
you think you're the oh-so-good one that we can't ignore you.
you kept blabbering about things in lesson, we need concentration.

stop repeating yourself, by saying something like
"omg, ______ is so hungry" 10 times within an hour.
how do you expect us to answer when we already know.
then you will go that we ignore you.
how funny you are.

you think i'm rude, i don't disagree with it.
cause i am, i admit.
it's part of me, and you drive it to get worst.
no i don't treat all people like that, but people like you, ought to deserve something like that.

you drove me to extreme, somehow, you giving me a face of please-come-irritate-me face.
how can i resist it?
nobody could.
and you start irritation first.

excel, you do have it, yet you said you didn't have.
you don't know how to use it doesn't mean you don't have it.
you could at least try, i pity ______ and _____.
they do and rush all by themselves till 4am.
yet you just get answers from others and sent to _____ and _____ treating that you did your part.

and, you always complaining that you're tired or having some stomach ache/cramp.
and we just let you rest without complain.
once happened, second time came, followed by third.
and you just happily surfing the com at the other side saying you needed to rest.
and i was like rushing here and there.
well done.

stop taking advantages of people.
we are not oblige to it.

does all this sound irresponsible?
yes to me.

you're plain rude as well.
know it youself and stop denying it.
you're a good denier.

more to say,
but oh well, this shall be all for now.

i don't need someone who need to reconsider friendship.
it's a fake and that's not call friendship at all.
nobody is perfect, so are you.
you're the oh-so-mighty-great one.
spare us.

there's nothing else i can say.

it's really quite sad to see what's happening to me or around me.

there's nothing much to say or do.

just a shake of the head and end it all.

i don't know, all seems to be blurred.

fuck it.

give a break, let's break free.

somehow, i really felt tired after everything.

it's time for me to break free from all the giving in and accommodating.

it wear me off so badly.

i tried my really best, but it seem to be so insufficient.

but it's true, everything wasn't match.

it's already a mistake to begin with.

we should have listen.

everything shouldn't be so tiring.

when enjoyment wasn't even there to the fullest.

it didn't help even if we talk about it.

damage already being made.

i tried so hard to take it all, yet it just kept charging towards me.

i'm not a dead, i do have my feelings.

i kept quiet, cause i need to do my thinking and there wasn't a need for me to speak.

when i talk, you assume i'm unhappy saying i'm fierce.

you don't know how mood spoiling that was.

to you, all the faults lies in me.

what should i do. yea, just shut up.

maybe i should say thanks to you, my trip wasn't enjoyable at all.